How NOT to Deal with Negative Reviews

There’s been a lot of talk recently about writers and their relationships with reviewers and it reminded me of a blog that was so infamous as to have become viral. In it, a reviewer wrote an even-handed description of a novel he read, including both the good and not-so-good parts of it.

The novelist’s response? “Fuck off!” *

Let’s be honest. Anyone who has ever written a book has a less-than-glowing review of that book out there somewhere. And yeah, it’s quite possible that your first instinct on reading that review is to say “fuck off.” But professional writers might say it to an empty room or over drinks with some friends, not typed on a public blog. Three times.

Negative reviews hurt. I won’t deny that I’ve been reduced to tears once or twice because not everyone in the world thought my book was the most fantastic thing they’ve ever read. I had a little pity party for myself and did my best to get over it. In fact, I’ve often (after the sting has worn off) gone back to read the review again for any critical insight I can take from it. I’ve learned a couple of things that I’m incorporating into my next book this way.

Are there reviews that an author can’t find the positive in at all? Sure, but the vast majority of reviewers will offer a fair and balanced accounting of a book. Rarely, a reviewer will attack a book like a possessed howler monkey with a personal grudge. In those cases, the novelist has to learn to turn off the web browser and walk away. Silently.

A reviewer isn’t a genius when he grants you a glowing review and an idiot when he gives you one star. He is a person who has his own opinions, feelings, experiences, and yes, bad days, just like you. No one person’s opinion, good or bad, should weigh so heavily on any writer.


* The author has since removed her comments from the blog.

2nd & Charles

Anyone who knows me or has been reading my blogs knows how unhappy I am at the loss of the two local Borders bookstores and the Borders Express I frequented. Then last month I discovered that the used bookstore I enjoyed was closing as well. It’s not been a good year for the brick and mortar bookstores.

The back wall art is made entirely of books.
Like the honey badger, it's pretty badass!

But there is a tiny bright spot in the vast wasteland of bookstore-less-ness in my area. Where my favorite Borders store had once been, a used bookstore opened, and I was able to spend a couple blissful hours there earlier this week.

It’s called 2^nd & Charles, part of a chain I hadn’t encountered before now. It sells – of course — used books, but also movies, video games (from the 360 all the way back to the old Nintendo cartridges!), and music. Pretty cool.

There’s no longer a café in the corner of the store, but they didn’t mind me bringing in my Starbucks. Book browsing is always better with a cup of chai in my hand! In fact, with the loss of the café comes plenty of extra room for all of those books. There are more and higher bookshelves than before, resulting in an overall increase in literary biomass (so to speak… though books do have a life of their own!).

No, it doesn’t completely make up for the loss of the Borders, but any day I come home with a bag full of books is a good one!

Sh*t Happens

Some days are just gonna suck.  It’s a fact of life.

About two years ago, after a series of maintenance problems ending with our landlord refusing to replace a heating/cooling system that no longer worked (yeah, tell me about it!), John and I decided simply to move.  We found a nice townhouse, signed a lease with the owner, who was moving to a larger home, and gave notice.  With only days remaining until the move, the woman who owned the townhouse informed us she hadn’t received the mortgage approval she’d been counting on.  She wasn’t going to move, and we were going to be homeless in a matter of days. 

“But we have a lease,” we said, but she just didn’t care.  Her attitude was pretty much “too bad, so sad.”

Could we have sued her?  Sure.  But what for?  To punish her?  To made a quick buck?  That just didn’t sit well with me.  The bottom line was we couldn’t force her to rent us her house – and wouldn’t that have been a fun relationship to have with our landlord? – and we couldn’t stay where we were. 

Now, I admit I have a bad temper.  And of course I can freak out and melt down and cry with the best of them!  But my point is this: shit happens.  What matters is how you deal with it.

In our situation, we started apartment hunting again that evening and ended up finding a much better townhouse that we absolutely love!  And we moved out of the old apartment right on time.

My other thought is that sometimes things happen for a reason.  My grandfather, another PA Dutch pragmatist, was a big proponent of this idea.  I think he’s right.  How many times has something – usually bad – happened to you that has led to one thing, then another, and finally to something great?

So here’s what I tell myself – while doing deep breathing exercises or blotting tears or downing a mai tai – whenever shit happens to me:

• ·      Is this really going to matter a year from now?
• ·      Can I do anything to fix this problem?
• ·      Remember that things sometimes happen for a reason.
• ·      How you respond to adversity can say a lot about you. 

After the problem has passed, I’m certainly not above using the drama as inspiration in a novel - and you thought my “don’t make me put you in my book” shirt was just for laughs!

Well, I didn’t mean this blog to come out like a self-help book!  I just wanted to share my thoughts on how I try to deal when I’m having a crappy day.  What are your thoughts?  How do you deal?

Blogging from A to Z April Challenge

I love a challenge. My thorough adoration of NaNoWriMo in November proves that. So when I heard of the challenge to write 26 blogs in April, I had to sign up. Yes, I know I'm not particularly good at keeping up with my blog, but that just made the challenge all the more attractive to me. 

Do I need a good kick in the pants? Yep. Do I work well under pressure? Absolutely. Do I need another project to work on? Well, maybe not so much, but I'm going to do it anyway. Am I stubborn? Oh yeah. Check, check, and check. 

So wish me luck. Feel free to taunt me if I fail. Which I won't, because... did you read the part about me being stubborn? Just making sure.

Blogging from A to Z April Challenge

Another Bookstore Bites the Dust

The last time I shopped at our local Borders

Over the weekend I went to our local used bookstore. After 20 years in the same location, they’re being forced to close. How depressing!

Many have remarked on how the publishing industry is changing. Some changes are wonderful and some… not so much. For me, the biggest change is how people are buying their books. Personally, I’m a huge fan of the Kindle, but I will never give up having paper books. Before the closing of Borders, I frequented at least one of five local bookstores about once a week on average. With the closing of the used bookstore, there’s now only one of those five left.

We’ve all discussed the whys of Borders' closing and ultimately how much it sucks for us book lovers. I’ve read several recent articles about how Amazon is shaking up the industry along with much speculation about what is coming next. At this point in the blog, I should offer some insight, but I find I have none to give. My only conclusion? I’m sad.

A Borders employee had this posted on their door. Yikes!

Sure, I like cashing in on book sales as much as the next person. Closing sales are huge! (My last Borders purchase was 8 books for $30. My used bookstore purchase was 11 books for $33.) But I would much rather forgo the sales and keep a couple more bookstores nearby.

I’m curious about how bookstores are doing in other areas. Compared to a year ago, how many remain open near you?